The Last Time

It's 8:45 pm and still I'm not feeling fine. The time's ticking and my sand clock's running out. Tick-tock, tick-tock that's the sound of the clock hanging from above, making me feel nauseous and anxious. I keep running and running till I got lost of air, my breathing is ragged, my heart's beating erratically. I tried running and running till I passed out and hasn't been able to move.

I woke up in a place that's seems unfamiliar. I saw my past, those nightmares I had in my dreams. I saw a girl crying in the corner, wishing that everything could stop, she's screaming and crying for help, she's begging for someone to save her but no one's there, no one's there to help her and no one could ever heard her. One moment the girl's crying the other moment, I saw the girl laying on the floor blood's been spilled all over the floor. I saw a tear trickled down to her cheeks. I tried to move my feet but I couldn't, I tried to speak but I'm voiceless.

The time shifted to another dimension, I saw a teenage girl suffering from depression. Her eyes are swollen, her hair's a mess, her wrist are full of cuts and scars, and her body's full of bruises. She was pitiful, she's been destroyed, I wanted to help but I couldn't because for the nth time I'm feeling helpless. I tried to take a look around me, to the place where we are, it shocked me and it horrified me to saw those writings on the wall. My eyes got watery, I felt sad upon of what I read. The girl's been slut-shamed, she's been bullied for no reason, she's been called with a lot of names, her body and soul was sold for nothing. I looked back at where she's standing, I was shocked to see her slit her throat. I tried to stop her but to no avail, my feet's stuck to where I'm standing. The last thing I saw was the girl crying, helpless calling for someone.

I got tired and scared of what I saw, I tried to get out of where I am. Though there's nothing that I could do, my body's shaking and full of scars. Then I was transferred from another place. The place's full of mirrors and I could clearly see myself. I took a step forward to look closely, I saw myself smiling until it changed into a frown down to a smirk, a mischievous smile. I got horrified of what I saw, the girl in the mirror is holding a gun, she then pointed it right through my face, I tried to run and escape but still I was stunned and I couldn't move my feet. Her face is dull and her eyes are ranging with anger. She then smirk and pulled the trigger, laughed upon my sudden reaction. The gun's not loaded, she just tricked me.

I got dizzy and then I fell suddenly everything went black. I woke up and saw a shape of a girl standing right in front of me. Then I saw another girl, the teenager looking back at me, and when I tried to look back, I saw the latest version of me. It all sink down on me, got me in a realization that they were all me. The little girl was the old fragile me, the teenager was the drastic part of me and the 20 year old is the treacherous and vicious me. They all took a step forward, immobilize and mutilated me. I fought for my own life but I couldn't do anything, rather than crying and screaming out of fear.

I woke up and saw the clock it says "12'o clock in the morning." I roam around and saw that I was still in a unfamiliar place but what's different is there were people, crying in front of a coffin. I took all of my guts to go to were they are, I was confused and frightened as to why my family and friends were all there. I tried to ask them of who are they crying from but I felt numb and my body stiffened when I heard that the body lying underneath was none other than me.

"I made this piece as an eye-opener about depression, anxiety and suicidal. As you could see it is one of the serious matter that some of us are facing. To have this kind of mental health issues are like facing a catastrophe. It wasn't that easy to discuss about this matter but I do want to take a step in making a way to stop the misconceptions and stigma about mental health.

As a reminder, every word counts, every actions can mean a lot of things. Let us be a guiding hand for those people who needed to shed some light. Let us save someone's life."